Crime and Punishment Review
Nov. 15th, 2009 07:15 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
dweomeroflightYes, this was possibly the worst book to film adaptation I've seen in awhile. John Simm, for a guy that only goes with good scripts, this was a mistake, but then I suppose you wanted to play a mad man. The opportunity was too great to be missed.
BUT REALLY GUYS- YOU CAST A LEEDS MAN IN A RUSSIAN PART. WHY? WHY WOULD YOU DO THIS?
and as if this didn't destroy the crediability enough, you make everything in St Petersburg as quintessentially english as possible. eg Porfiry continuously drinking tea. oh and it didn't help that Porfiry was played by Ian McDiarmind- he of Senator Palpatine fame. my friend and I kept expecting him to say to Raskalnikov, "Come to the Dark side of the force!"
ok, so once we got over how crap the casting was and the fact that everyone in Russia apparently had dialect british accents, the script ruined the rest of the film. eg John Simm continuously saying, "anyway," "shit" and "bugger" They really didn't use those words in the 19th century love. I think the funniest line was probably the one about "Sonia being the genuine article," in the most Simmian accent possible. My friend and I exploded into laughter.
By part 2, paying out the programme and saying how much better the actual novel was (yes I have read it) was getting boring so we changed tack to reimagining the film as a musical. Hilarity ensued.
eg when Raskalnikov tells Sonia the pawnbroker deserved to die, we imagined a rousing chorus of "she had it coming, she had it coming, she only had herself to blame, if you'd have been there, if you'd of seen it, I betcha you would have done the same!"
Now John Simm doing the cell block tango is something I'd pay good money to see lol.
or when Raskalnikov tells his Mum he had to leave I couldn't help but add in "I'm sorry mama, I never meant to hurt chu, I never meant to make chu cry, but tonight I'm cleaning out my closet." (haha JS rapping. Also would pay money to see)
But I think the best part was coming up with the finale, when Sonia and Raskalnikov are sitting next to each other lovingly in Siberia (apparently Siberia is an idyllic sunny place where prisoners idle their time away under trees) and my friend started singing 'I say a little prayer for you" The whole cast could have come out and joined in!
So the actual movie itself would get maybe 2 out of 5, but Crime and Punishment the musical: 5 outta 5 for sure.
Though I have to admit, even as a crazy mad man, I was still convinced JS really just needed a hug and he'd be fine.
that is a man in serious need of a hug :)
In other news I had an epiphany about my story today which will make it a whole lot better. Unfortunately, this means rewriting whole sections again... and joy of joys... a damn sequel. So much for simply writing a 1500 word ramble.
BUT REALLY GUYS- YOU CAST A LEEDS MAN IN A RUSSIAN PART. WHY? WHY WOULD YOU DO THIS?
and as if this didn't destroy the crediability enough, you make everything in St Petersburg as quintessentially english as possible. eg Porfiry continuously drinking tea. oh and it didn't help that Porfiry was played by Ian McDiarmind- he of Senator Palpatine fame. my friend and I kept expecting him to say to Raskalnikov, "Come to the Dark side of the force!"
ok, so once we got over how crap the casting was and the fact that everyone in Russia apparently had dialect british accents, the script ruined the rest of the film. eg John Simm continuously saying, "anyway," "shit" and "bugger" They really didn't use those words in the 19th century love. I think the funniest line was probably the one about "Sonia being the genuine article," in the most Simmian accent possible. My friend and I exploded into laughter.
By part 2, paying out the programme and saying how much better the actual novel was (yes I have read it) was getting boring so we changed tack to reimagining the film as a musical. Hilarity ensued.
eg when Raskalnikov tells Sonia the pawnbroker deserved to die, we imagined a rousing chorus of "she had it coming, she had it coming, she only had herself to blame, if you'd have been there, if you'd of seen it, I betcha you would have done the same!"
Now John Simm doing the cell block tango is something I'd pay good money to see lol.
or when Raskalnikov tells his Mum he had to leave I couldn't help but add in "I'm sorry mama, I never meant to hurt chu, I never meant to make chu cry, but tonight I'm cleaning out my closet." (haha JS rapping. Also would pay money to see)
But I think the best part was coming up with the finale, when Sonia and Raskalnikov are sitting next to each other lovingly in Siberia (apparently Siberia is an idyllic sunny place where prisoners idle their time away under trees) and my friend started singing 'I say a little prayer for you" The whole cast could have come out and joined in!
So the actual movie itself would get maybe 2 out of 5, but Crime and Punishment the musical: 5 outta 5 for sure.
Though I have to admit, even as a crazy mad man, I was still convinced JS really just needed a hug and he'd be fine.
that is a man in serious need of a hug :)
In other news I had an epiphany about my story today which will make it a whole lot better. Unfortunately, this means rewriting whole sections again... and joy of joys... a damn sequel. So much for simply writing a 1500 word ramble.
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no subject
Date: 2009-11-15 09:08 am (UTC)John Simm in a musical? I think you'd die. I honestly think the excitement may render you unconcious. ^^'
Unfortunately, I don't know what Crime and Punishment is about. :(
Hey hey, have you read Lolita?
no subject
Date: 2009-11-15 09:24 am (UTC)Lolita is on my 'to read' list. unfortunately that list is quite massive as I also have to find time to read some Kate Elliot, Garth Nix and Sara Douglass
no subject
Date: 2009-11-15 09:42 am (UTC)I don't know much about Russia but even to me saying 'she's the genuine article' sounds wrong. Hah. 8D
Lolita is weird. I don't know if I like it, more it just induced me to really want to punch the narrator in the face.
Another book you should add is 'We Need To Talk About Kevin'. It's really sad, and the scary part is that it's quite real. :/
no subject
Date: 2009-11-15 09:47 am (UTC)what's 'we need to talk about kevin' about?
no subject
Date: 2009-11-15 12:20 pm (UTC)The book's written from the POV of a mother whose son is a serial killer. Like one of the ones who goes into school and kills heaps of people.
It's written afterwards, and she tries to explore what made Kevin the way Kevin was, like her life before she had Kevin, her actions, how she treated him as a baby, how her husband treated him. It's... So sad.
no subject
Date: 2009-11-16 12:50 am (UTC)I'd rather not read that :( sounds really depressing
no subject
Date: 2009-11-16 01:12 am (UTC)It is depressing, but very interesting! The thing is... She was a terrible mother, she was jealous of how much her husband loved Kevin, and yeah~ You begin to think Kevin killed so many people to get attention from her.
Well, fair enough you don't wanna read it actually, I was quite gloomy after I finished the book. :(
no subject
Date: 2009-12-11 01:46 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2009-12-11 01:49 am (UTC)Mind you John Simm was still an astounding actor, but I just felt the film would have been so much better with a better script and director :(
but watch it for JS for shizzle. He is still quite hot in it :P
and imaginin it as a musical was muchly fun
no subject
Date: 2009-12-11 01:52 am (UTC)John should be in a musical and I want to be in the front row. Know he is starring in Hamlet some time soon and a mad I can't see it!! No fair!!
no subject
Date: 2009-12-11 01:56 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2009-12-11 01:58 am (UTC)David was awesome in Hamlet though.
Still wish to see John in something on stage